Are Your Emotions Driven By Your Values?
The Value Of Your Emotions
What gets you angry? So many things could do it. It’s easy to understand the motive of an angry person. They just yell at you or walk away in silence and you know by their body language they’re angry. But what triggered that anger? Was it something you said? Why did what you say anger them? In this Mixcloud podcast I share the top tips for what truth about emotional people and what they value most.
Each of us has a set of rules for feeling good. Violate those rules and they begin to experience anger. Here’s what you need to know so you can remain calm when others trigger anger in you.
1. All we value is set up in hierarchical order.
2. For some people “peace” is higher on the list that “connection”.
3. So if your conversation disrupts someone’s peaceful state, they will disconnect with you. Your connection or conversation has disrupted their emotions about peace.
Telling The Truth About Your Emotions
Emotions are the manifestation of our values.
To be sure your emotions are consistent with a happy life there are some steps you can take.
1. List your values and place them in order of most important to least important. (do 10 values)
2. See if any 2 are not consistent with each other. e.g. freedom and security.
3. Decide what you want more and switch the list around to make it easier to be happy with them.
4. Create rules about your values. e.g. Love: I love others unconditionally. OR Love: I love those who love me first.
5. Create rules that support your value priorities. e.g. Freedom: To be free means to never be tied down in a relationship. Freedom:To be free means to be in a relationship where each of us feels free to be ourselves without judgement.
Emotions Are Triggered By Your Values
The Truth About Values
Most of what we value is an accumulation of emotions we felt about circumstances from our past. If we desire happiness in life, we can change what we value and make rules to support a happy life that doesn’t conflict with other things we value. First thing to do is to make that list. Check it twice and see if you are in conflict. Conflicts may be contributing to a lack of success in your emotions and happiness. To be truly happy and satisfied, we create rules that help us to avoid pain and experience the most pleasure. Make your list so that it’s easy to live by.
Emotions and Judgement
The responsibility for our happiness lies within us. Remove any conflicts of values and you’re on your way to the happy life you desire and deserve. The scripture verses, “Judge not lest you be judged” and “Remove the speck from your eye before you try to remove the log out of someone else’s eye”, show what our character should be when it comes to our judgement of others. When we speak out emotionally against the way another person lives, we are showing our dissatisfaction about the things that person values. But we don’t know the “whole” of the person. Where we are weak, that other person may be strong. We ought better check ourselves and what we value. Remember that the strength of our relationships are based on the things we value most. And we all value different things most. By setting up “win win” rules that accept what others value most, we are showing good character and maintaining good emotions to which we will not be judged by others. Listen here to this supplemental podcast to learn more.
Set Up The Values You Want Most and Your Positive Emotions Will Follow.
